Thursday, May 01, 2008

SHE WAS A PARTY DOG

Licking her lips at every Burberry-wearing European honeyboy that passed her outside the bar, she thanked heaven she skirted a drunk driving charge and came to Holland. It meant knocking over an athletic shoe emporium and losing her sister's baby for a couple hours, but she thought she might crack the fashion world by knitting hats out of shoelaces. So far, the best thing to happen since her arrival was being told by a cop that she "has a nice scent." She remembered a high school graduation openhouse in which a friend drunk on whiskey & V8 bent her arm the wrong way over his knee. Pausing mid-bend he said, "It smells like hot dogs -- big time!" It was no surprise to hear that he became a cop after high school. Or was it that he got arrested? Either way, now she had a mighty hankering for some hot lil' smokies.

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